Can I be real with you for a moment? Without you feeling like I need pity or advice? Because seriously, I’ve got this. But can you just hear me out for a sec?
It’s amazing what kids will do to you. Change you. Change your priorities. I was really surprised to find myself so changed by a fourth child. You would think…you’ve done this. Three times. Two times recently. You’ve got this. It’s just one more diaper change, one more bottle. One more nap time. That and he’s so friggin precious and happy. Luke is truly an amazing, happy baby.
Nope. Not at all. Not for me anyway. I find myself running, **running** around my house all day (Fitbit–38,465 steps yesterday…what?!), feeding Luke, putting out toddler fights and fires, trying to time nap times just perfectly so they’ll be rested enough when we go to pick up Sophie.
Oh right, she changed schools after Thanksgiving and now the bus doesn’t go to our house so I pick her up everyday. For the record, it was the most positive thing we could have ever done for her. She LOVES it. She’s thriving. So at 2:20 pm everyday, I wake up 3 kids, load them in the van, sit in the pick up line with Secret Life of Pets playing in the background and get to hear all about Sophie’s day at her new school. Is it worth it? Yes. It was a very, very positive thing. And I love that time in the car with Sophie.
We also learned that Sophie is deaf in one ear and Jack has Sensory Processing Disorder. We do First Steps (early intervention) twice a week to get him caught up for his age and ready for school. He starts Occupational Therapy in 2 weeks. His providers are hopeful. And he has made so much progress over the past 3 months. At 24 months, he couldn’t point, clap, tell us what he wanted, say ‘momma’ or ‘yes’; he basically couldn’t do anything his age. Now he babbles like crazy, says about 10 words and is so much happier and less frustrated. He’s smart, he gets it. Now we just have to get it out of him.
Sophie is being fitted for a hearing aid. After an MRI, they determined there’s no tumor, just unilateral hearing loss. I feel 200% guilty because who misses this? She came home one day and said she was having trouble hearing. I thought ear infection. Allergies. Her speech was completely unaffected and she was doing well in school. I had no idea until she failed a hearing test in the fall that, oh crap, she’s not ignoring me. She really can’t hear. My sweet, smart, super achiever baby is deaf in one ear. Crazy. And amazing how well she has compensated. We really had no clue.
So basically in the last 3 months, our lives have changed in every aspect possible. Truth–I’ve never felt less competent as a mom. I feel like I have failed on so many levels. At the same time, I have complete comfort in knowing that all of this was supposed to happen at this exact time and like any other challenge, God will grant me with the strength and resolve to push through and find solutions.
As you can imagine, I wasn’t out in my office much working. Blogging wasn’t exactly my first priority. Which meant unfortunately, my beautiful 14 x 30 space was being completely being wasted and neglected. That made me sad. Not just the wasted space, but that fact that I worked so hard to get that space in the first place.
So I made some changes. And I have to admit, I absolutely love it now. Instead of it just being a place to go to work, it serves as a retreat for my husband and I when we need to recharge. It also acts as a guest room when family comes to visit. And, Sophie comes out here when she needs a quiet space to do her homework and read. Take a look:
The majority of furniture and accessories came from the stuff I used to stage my house last year. Over the next few weeks, I’m going to be posting about all of the systems that I have implemented to help life run smoothly and efficiently in a home with 4 kids. Everything from meal planning to organizing to scheduling will be covered.
Life is extremely different than it was 6 months ago. But I’m excited about these new changes and plan to embrace them like I do everything in life! I can’t wait to share with you.